I make promises to people all the time- promise I’ll get that done for you, promise I’ll call tonight, promise to be there- and I’m pretty good at following through (minus a couple episodes of mom brain). But do you know who I absolutely cannot keep a promise to? Myself.
When I first got diagnosed with Diastasis Recti I was determined to fix it and I promised myself that I would. Before I even became pregnant I promised myself that I would take the time to take care of my body for my own well being as well as being an example to my kids. And for a while I did.
I hit my pre-pregnancy weight. I worked hard to rebuild my core- but then life got busy. For a while I was maintaining, I kept focusing on alignment. But as time went on I focused less and less. The the other day I bent over and felt everything shift- I was instantly sick to my stomach. One look in the mirror and DR test later confirmed my suspicions, I had lost almost all of my progress.
Sure I was still maintaining my weight, but the stomach pooch and lack of muscle control had come back with a vengeance. Cue pitty party.
How was I ever going fix this? How was my core ever going to be strong. It was just going to get worse with every baby. I would never have the body I wanted. These thought beat me up over and over again until I felt depressed and disgusted with myself.
Then as I was in the shower this morning I had a thought:
Just let that sink in.
How many times have you promised yourself something only to not follow through?
We promise to loose the weight, ditch the toxic relationship, love ourselves, accept ourselves, practice self-love. But time after time we let other people and things take priority, why? Because whether we are doing it subconsciously or not- we don’t view ourselves as worthy to be a priority.
This is probably my greatest challenge- how do I create a life where I do value myself as being a priority? It’s not that I hate myself, but there clearly is a disconnect somewhere. So how do I fix it?
Start keeping my promises. Though it was physical change that drew my attention, I realized that the true problem was far below the surface. It was a heart and soul problem.
So today I start fresh. I’m taking a step back and resetting my intentions: